Last Friday I had a car accident and honestly though I wouldn't live to see another day. I don't doubt that my angels were looking out for me, and were even trying to let me know they were there for me before it happened.
It was a wet day and I had driven to a beauty appointment. Normally, my mother in law watches my toddler while I go. If she had have, I would have been driving my own car, and had him with me. However, as she had recently had surgery I did not want to ask her to look after him so I made arrangements with my husband that he would take our son with him while running errands for the day, and I would instead drive his ute (he needed my car for the baby seat). This would turn out to be very lucky later on.
Whilst at my appointment I had my eyes closed while my beautician worked and we were chatting away about random things, when a very clear image of my Dad flashed before my (closed) eyes. My dad passed away 5 years ago, and I have never had anything like this occur before, I have only seen him occasionally when I am dreaming. I told my beautician as he appeared so out of the blue, and I said I think he is just letting me know he is still around and watching over us.
On my way home from my appointment, I was driving along and saw my Dad's sign, 3 birds (you can read more about the significance of 3 birds as my Dad's sign here). I mentally acknowledged him and thanked him for being there.
Further along on my trip home I saw a rainbow. Last year, my friend tragically lost their rainbow baby, a son born after they lost their first born daughter, who had came along and brought joy back to their lives. Sadly due to genetic issues causing a heart condition, he passed away on his first birthday. In the days after his passing I was writing a song about him, and had come up with a line that went "you are the rainbows...". I was driving this day too and I was unsure if I was on the right track, and thinking whether I should be writing the song at all, when suddenly I saw the biggest and brightest rainbow I have ever seen. I took at as a sign, finished the song and called it Rainbows Baby. It was played at his funeral and is so special to me. Now whenever I see a rainbow, I think of him, as I did this time and I a hello to our beautiful little angel in the sky.
The next sign from my angels was different. My phone beeped that I had received a message. Normally I would instinctively look over and sometimes the message is displayed on the screen if my phone is active from a podcast or maps etc. But a little voice said 'don't look at your phone', then a memory replayed in my mind about a friend of mine who tragically lost her partner in a road accident, due to another driver being distracted by their phone. So my eyes stayed firmly on the road.
Moments later I had an accident that was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life.
Although it was no longer raining, there had been storms and heavy rain earlier and the roads were still wet. I was travelling on a highway where the speed limit is 110kms per hour, at a time when the roads are normally very busy. I was doing about 95-100 kms when suddenly my car aquaplaned and I started to lose control of it. It swayed across both lanes then began spinning in 360's in the middle of the road before crashing into metal bollards on the side of the road, leaving my car stuck horizontally across the highway. That part of the road is a bend, anyone coming behind me would have had no time to slow down, it was almost peak hour and usually very busy, yet not a single car came past during what I estimate was at least 30-40 seconds before I was able to bring my car back around and get off the road. The moment I did a truck hurtled past followed by more cars. Literally the moment I was off the road.
I burst into tears as what had just happened sunk in.
I had honestly thought I was going to die, and as it was unfolding I was thinking of my boys and how desperately I didn't want to leave them. I don't doubt that my angels had my back that day, and for some reason, it just wasn't my time. Fate had it that I didn't have my son that day or my own car, which I believe may not have withstood the impact of the crash. I didn't look at my phone which had I, would certainly have delayed my reaction time and who knows what would have occurred.
While reflecting on it all I asked myself this.
If I had died, what might I regret, or wish I'd done differently? Would I wish I'd spent more time doing some things than others? Would I wish I could have changed anything?
I am so grateful for my life. But there were some things I would do differently. And now I have been given the opportunity to change them.
I am grateful my angels were watching over me and promise myself and them to make the most of my life, and make the changes that I need to so that I truly can live without regrets.
I'd love you to ask yourself the same questions, about what you might wish you could do differently if your life was suddenly over today. Then go out and do them.
Love Nikki x
P.S. This is the song 'Rainbows Baby' that I wrote for our friends little angel.